Week 9: Me and Wife had a big fight

This week was a terrible week. Wife had a meltdown which cause her to run away. I am sad and when I am sad I tend to buy things. Which I got a ps portal that I haven't tested yet. I am very stressed this week. I need to centre myself again 

Feb 22 (4th Ramadan)

• Today the cleaner is cleaning the house so I did some extra classes

• Took a nap and then wife said I don't need to cook so I can buy stuff at the nearby shop

• I hate going to the market since I tend to overbuy. But thank goodness that after we ate the cleaner took the leftovers home 

• Went to terawih with the cleaner and send her home. Came back close to 11pm

Feb 23 (5th Ramadan) (unmemorable)

• Today I cook some Ayam rempah and masak lemak sayur for iftar 

• Today had a fight with wife. She told me I am sex crazy. So I was hurt and then I told her that she wins. Starting today I won't touch her anymore. She can do what she wants and I won't expect anything from her. Its been almost 20 years and it has just being getting worse. Remember what I say "don't get upset over things you can't control" and I can't control this. So I need to make peace and move on.

• Wife said she was sorry and proceed to sleep by hugging me like trying to make up for it but I think the damage is done. Whatever it is.. is in her court right now... I know I will get sex but I think the frequency will be few and far between. I need to find a new hobby or at least keep myself super busy.

Feb 24 (6th Ramadan)

• Today wife want to eat sushi so I don't need to cook. After sending her to work I did extra classes.

• After that we went to the optometrist to fix wife's glasses and send her back to work 

• Went to the mall to get the sushi, get my raya clothes. 

• Iftar and then terawih. Normal day today 

Feb 25 (7th Ramadan)

• Did classes and have to cook a lot since wife invited students over

• Wife wasn't in a good mood today because of a dream she had. That sucks. She is taking it out on me 

• Came back H1 is with her boyfriend. I ask them to pick up H2 only to get scolded by H1 because H2 was late. Sigh

• Cooked some Briyani rice, salsa and egg curry. The students came and cooked some chicken sliders. Yummy. My rice was a bit lumpy due to too much water

• H1 was being a but annoying didn't want to hang with the kids. She ate a bit and left. 

• After that I took her boyfriend home and we talk saying that H1 needs some help with her mental health. I kind of agree and hopefully I can fix this problem soon

• Coming back from terawih I played some cards with the girls till midnight.

Feb 26 (8th Ramadan) (unmemorable) 

• Today I planned to make some meatballs eaten with spaggeti and potatoes

• Wife was in a bad mood in the morning. In the afternoon I need to send her to work she yelled at me when I ask her. I kept quiet and after sending her to the office. She said she is leaving me today and took the car and went to her moms house

• The first thing I did was damage control. Talk to her dad. After that we had a big fight. Everything came out and I know we both are lacking in both departments but we are trying. I don't know where it is going from here. She didn't plan to go back home today. So today I slept alone by choice

• My best friend is not feeling well but she needs to get ready to fly to Indonesia tomorrow. Hopefully all goes well.  

Feb 27 (9th Ramadan)

• Woke up alone in my bed is sad but I get ready the kids to eat. H1 joined us since she loves the meatballs. 

• Did classes and send H1 to school. After classes did groceries and pick up H1 from school. Went to pray at the uni and pick up H2 later

• Today I plan to make some grilled chicken sandwhiches with tomato soup. 

• Wife came back in the evening. We hugged and probably made up. 

• In the evening she cried because she thinks she is not a priorty in this family and everything revolves around my schedule which is frustrating since we need to know about time. So basically I am at fault here. 

• My best friend went to Indonesia for work. She was not feeling well so the doctor gave her some medicine and she rest

Feb 28 (10th Ramadan) (New Stuff) 

• Had early intimate time with wife because last night she cried she can't gave it to me. After the suhoor she slept till afternoon

• Wife got so angry at me and list down everything that she was upset about. Bascially everything is my fault what I do will make her feel anxious. I think going forward things are going to change dramatically. Need to think before saying soemthing. Sigh

• I was looking for a new device for myself. I found a PS Portal for my collection sicne I want to play more PS5 games but on the bed. Met that guy and pay RM720 for the machine. I Got the black limited edition one which was the colour I wanted.

• We decided to break fast at my mom in laws house. Drove there and went to buy food. Just spend time relaxing while waiting to break fast

• After break fast, terawih and pick up the cleaner before heading home 

• Today my friend went around Jakarta and didn't fast. She went home late and was late coming home. She is going to rest the whole day tomorrow. 

Next week the only thing I have plan is buying some kuih raya. Other than that is just enjoying the last 20 days of Ramadan. Beside that this is also the end of Febuary. The shortest month of the year. With Dad in law giving us a health scare. Me losing a friend (also making new ones) and the biggest thing is that me and wife a short falling out. Febuary has been a bad month. The only good part of it is Ramadan which is ongoing and I enjoy every minute of being spritual. Lets hope March will fare better